What used

Time for a self written poem on the latest tv series i watched lately:

I feel everyone is like a Dwight,

who always thinks that he is right.

I like to be a Stanley,

who still can be funny when he is cranky.

Who wants to be an Angela?

If she was my woman, i wish she be hit by a car.

Who can forget Kevin,

An awesome dude who just needs a bit of loving.

I really really like Andrew Bernard,

He is funny, witty, can play music, but sometimes a retard.

Ah, of course we then have Jim and Pam,

Surely people wants to be like them living life hand in hand.

There's Oscar, Toby, Phyllis and more,

I lazy to think of rhymes anymore.

Last but not least, who isn't like a Michael Scott?

Attention, friends, company and love he soughts,

not forgetting, how the heck does he get girlfriends that are hot??

That's all, as i was thinking what career path i am wanting to venture in, i really was inspired by the Earth Song video and They Don't Really Care About Us video, by Michael Jackson, yeap, i recently went through most of his music videos, and apart from still mourning the lost of a great musician and dancer, i think he really captured something most people can't in their lifetime.

You have a lot of people going about their causes to save stuff here and there, but i think MJ really got the whole message in a short music video, it is quite cool that apart from musical talent, he has the talent to produce strong social message.

It is debatable whether after viewing such videos will lead to more social awareness and actions, or will it stick through the passage of time.

But as of now, i thought of doing some side projects, maybe short films and stuff, since now i have a bit of time here and there in between classes or sleeps, can probably do it.

Though unfortunately, apart from growing responsibilities, i have no camcorder or equipments, not even a decent sound card to do anything, and zilch knowledge in editing. So, maybe its all talk.

But of course, since i wrote it here, if anyone bothers, can pop me a question once in awhile to check on my progress, at least a bit of accountability.

Munchkin anyone?

Come, lets play soon.

-Soon Gone-

You Say

Police set up pondok polis everywhere;

you say they looking for bribes.

A particular political party wins;

you say the election was rigged.

A newspaper reports positively of the government;

you say the media is biased.

The PM says 1Malaysia;

you say 1black malaysia.

People conforms to mainstream ideas;

you say they are brainwashed.

People like indie music;

you say they are a bunch of showoffs.

Ministers sometimes do their best;

you say they are a bunch of idiots.

People going through some bad problems in life;

you say they are emo.

Men who truly loves fashion design;

you say they are probably gay.

If you have everything to say against everything, forget reformation, forget unity and forget about progress. Instead of just saying, do something about it, for ONCE.

1

I would like a girl who doesn't hunch please.

Yeap

Running With Tweezers

There, done. I finally got thru my thesis defense yesterday! I am so done. Really, i am glad that it went well, supervisor and co-marker were gracious towards me. I rather happy that the work and research that i came up and done by myself (with the help of many good friends who were willing to help during the course of this research) had paid off, and i am not sure what grade i am gonna get, but rest assured, it is done, i think i did it justice and so did my supervisor and co-marker. So yeap, another phase, has come and gone!

So, what's next? Got 4 more subjects before i graduate, 2 first year electives, which mean i start class next week, and psych only starts the week after, so yea, finally got my thesis out of the way, and then comes a new semester. Final one too.

Sometimes, people can utterly stupid and dumb, ignorant, self-absorbed and much more, are we really programmed this way? But when some people actually go and do free work, social work, missions, they get criticized and questions about regarding their true motives and all. If good work is being done, let it be done. Not as if you work in a damned corporate world is contributing much to those in need. What with your fancy cars and houses. So shut ya trap and give these people a break.

So coming back to what i was saying, some people just cannot see that little things they do and don't do affect the system, some people were born with the wisdom, some sought for it, some just has it but refused to use it. Ah, ranting.

Its like in a tv sitcom, you got the serious guy, the motherly girl, the idiotic friend and a wuss to be bullied throughout the series. So, in another way to put it, you gotta have these kind of people in the world, if there were no idiots, then the smart ones wouldn't be smart, or if all were good, then no one is truly good right?

Well, at least with some proper motivation, some may choose the wiser path in respect to the current circumstances.

Like me, i choose not to sleep, so i could watch some more tv before my holidays are really over.

All about choices. You think God didn't had a choice? He did. Do we have choices? Yup, totally. Pick the right choice, stop reading and go watch some tv. That is what i am gonna do... right about..... now.

-To The Grave-

Twang

Got a thesis presentation up next, and defense too.

Did aplenty this past two weeks, watched a couple of plays, barbecues, 2 of them in fact. Met up with some friends here and there.

But the most significant thing that happened was getting over the feeling of growing up. One can always lament and wallow the pains of growing up or just be at ease at them and accept it.

I'm a late bloomer. Yea, i wanted to be in neverland, the peter pan version, not MJ version, say, a close quarter life crisis. Didn't thought i'd jump a few stages ahead in Erikson's developmental stages.

I could think life as: gonna get a job soon, do some menial work, settle down, have kids, watch them grow up and rot in my grave.

But i guess, if life were to be seen that way, it'd be sad, pathetic really.

Come what may, if this is rock bottom, then the only way is up. Think it should get interesting, much more interesting soon.

But have to trim hair before that, can't let it get caught somewhere and drag me slower.

-Ye Shall Walk Not Alone-

Moist!

Ok, lets have pictures! here is my taiping trip, photos consist of HocMun's and mine, the better looking ones are Hoc's! Here you go:

Near Maxwell Hill, monkeys conquered metal monster, win!

Graves of past soldiers who fought a war on this very land

Bukit Merah Laketown Resort, was alright, i guess, haha

Maxwell Hill! the ride up was something else, but the view is awesome!

We played Balderdash! Then took a pic, no tulips at that time, but hey, least we know there are tulips in Taiping!

No taiping girl stop to notice us :(

So might as well stuff ourselves with durian before we leave right?

Had good fun, short trip but worth it!

-Birds of A Feather-

It really means if you are friends with me, you are somewhat similar to me, so if i'm weird, guess what, you are too! HA! But i really am normal :)

Prep

As I am quite done with my thesis, i am prep to look for other things to do, i just got back from a minor job, blog about it later.

As of now, few things i should get sometime this year:

1. A decent looking wallet, my current one was a gift which was heavily abused till now looks like a pile of unwanted newspaper.
2. A functioning wrist watch, not the digital kind, it says you're punctual! Which HocMun supports the claim as well!
3. One more pair of jeans.
4. A decent looking casual shoe. My converse shoes also a bit overused already.
5. A haircut.
6. A decent looking belt, my current one is free, and torn on one side, so i flip the buckle the other side, now looks better, but not nice, also, it doesn't really buckle me properly.
7. Change specs (optional)
8. Nicer shirts, realized i keep wearing same ol same ol.

-Thought Stream-

Old Skool

I think the older times are great, yesss, i am getting older, and i am becoming one of those people who says, "ah the good ol' days, 'sup?"

I find newer stuff not as appealing, yea they got some cool stuff like better video games, some good movies, technology, but look at what the setback it brought us:

• Newer generations getting dumber
• Newer generations, specifically girls getting shorter and less developed. Due to food intake? All those new health crap and chemicals must be doing us wrong someway somehow.
• They screw us over in movies like Dragonball and Transformers who just wanna milk the franchise of the money. Damn you hollywood! Wait, no, hollywood actually gave us some good stuff, so.. damn you worthless sell outs!
• Prices are jacked up for most anything
• Apparently talking is a form of music
• Now words can be reduced to just random letters, ok maybe not so random, lol, jk, lol? ROFL!
• People has shorter lives! Man, the olden days got people living up to 500 years old! Thats like almost4.5 times more than us now! And imagine, can have longer partying days, gaming days, courting girls days if we live longer! Unless you're a loser... then, ouch?
• Instead of radioactive spider who bit peter parker, we now got genetically altered spider! HOW LAME IS THAT?
• And what the future has brought us thus far? My car still can't transform! I don't have a virtual gf, all that i do when i play The Sims
• Cartoons are almost hopeless
• Stalking made easy
• Bell bottoms not in fashion!!!
• No smart pill for me
• Sometimes i cannot diffrentiate she-males or he-females from normal males and females, damn you technology and ya advance makeover skills!

okok, i can go on and on

The older days, at least, at least has Michael Jackson :(

Sigh.

Niche

Been hearing and talking about post grad life, yea, end of the year will be officially study free, mom ask me do masters, but.... am i really up for it? not now la, studying since 6, now i'm 23.. thats 16 years! wait, er, 17 years! Maths fail.... i failed education! Or, since i'm in this place... did education failed me?

Anyway, all i hear about the working life are money issues, taxes, loans, ho

w you should plan ya life.

Attended cell yesterday and someone spoke about finances and how you shojl manage it well. Yea, it was good, wise and definitely his words was worth following after. But... what i heard was:

1. I am gonna have more responsibilities.
2. Must get house before car to prepare for marriage life
3. Gonna work like a dog, wait dogs don't work.. erm..work... like.. slaves, paid slaves! yeap, work like paid slaves to pay off loans.
4. Credit card is murder
5. Taxes are troublesome
6. something about half past 6 government (lost track of this one)
7. Life gonna suck.

Before anyone gets all holy moly on me. I don't wanna end up on a cycle of paying debts and loans, earning money and buy stuff and tax deduction and and marriage! whats up with marriage! WHY EVERYONE AROUND ME GETTING MARRIED! Stop it! epidemic!!! ITS A SICKNESS! Get away!! H1N1 is not as bad as marriage (no actually, H1N1 you actually suffer less than marriage, BOOM! LAWYERED!)!!! ARGH!!

I digress.

Ok, back to my point, yea, in one sense, its awesome you gotta make good financial plans, but where gone the childhood dreams? Where gone the "dude, i am so gonna open a bar" or "lets travel the world and forgot the corporate world!"

Now its all about money money money.

I should know, me and my family constantly have financial issues, been there done that, so i know how important is money!

But.. is life all about striving for money? Yea, you throw God in the picture, then we should use it for God, but then... in retrospect, you see how much our life revolves around the greens? Claim all you want about God giving us money so we can put in good use, to me, honestly, we just sometimes use that as an excuse to find more money.

OK, stop, i know if you wanna preach about cash and God, save it, i know!

What i am trying to say is that, even myself, i am already starting to hunt for job, why? All

because of money, if money didn't exist, then there wouldn't be such things as debt, or loans, but in reality, money is always an issue. Just speaking of it, i bought a Rm78 modem! because for some stupid reason, my modem died on me. There, RM78! Money i've been saving to go overseas next year to visit friends! How long am i gonna save my money before i can afford a one way ticket to somewhere?

Money, pfft, if i were alone in this world with no attachment no family, i think money would not be so much of an issue, but now got family to care, and study loans, so have to strive for it, no

bumming or slacking after graduation, work work work, Work my ass off to pay off ptptn, pay back mom and dad, then plan for my future, sigh, a cycle, a stupid dead end cycle, no wonder movies are fairy tales, how can one actually just dump everything and "live life"? I wish i could.

Enough ranting, amidst all this, i guess, i will find something better to strive for soon. Soon.

-I'm Awesome-

101

I noticed something strange as of late...

My dog, Pepper, has been barking more than usual, and to whom? Other dogs in the neighborhood. Wait, before you think me crazy, read me out:

1. He never bark at other dogs before.
2. He doesn't care of our neighbors dog.
3. Everytime i stand up, he looks at me with puppy eyes and wait till i am out of sight to resume his deeds.

Now, he barks and wags his tail at neighboring dogs, and, guess what? The other dogs bark back! And this goes on for a good half minute. The worst part, is that he runs to the back and to the front and communicate with different dogs.

Dogs are intelligent i tell you, if not Pavlov's dog wouldn't be now a subject still to be studied in this world!

Also, i have referenced 101 dalmatians, and when they bark like this, they are planning something.

So, i am gonna be on high alert, watching my dog's every move, if he is planning world domination, i at least wanna be on his side.

If you think my conspiracy theory is wild and crazy, dude, you've been living under a shell.

Nothing is impossible!

Surviving Suburbia

Last saturday attended my previous church's youth event, it was great to see some people whom i haven't seen in awhile, though not all were as friendly as i remembered them to be, some remained the same, some having rough patches, some just.. well whoever they were.

Played games, such as charades, a really looooooooong game, no really loooooooooooooooooooooooooong game. Ate food, and most of them time the usual hey, 'sup? You're funny! Yea man, totally, what! kinda chit chat.

I think can tell certain people were uncomfortable, and i find myself neither here nor there. Someone said someone was taking a sabbatical and was in a "pfft" kind of tone, i felt bad for the person the other person was speaking about.

Incoherent thoughts leaves me passing each day like it was yesterday, in a daze.

Well, least my thesis is progressing somewhat, better than not doing anything about it, it all comes down whether i am doing it right or not.

OSG

Today is the birthday of a dear friend, Daniel Ong.

I probably mentioned it before, but i knew him way back in kindergarten, when i was 6 year old crying brat who already hated going for classes when i could be spending my time watching tv and getting fat.

I cannot remember when was the last time we actually had a good laugh together, a proper meal, or even a proper conversation face-to-face.

Things happened, circumstances changed, and now he is pretty far away, only way to communicate is msn.

All in all, things went the way it did for a reason, but least we still friends, aye?

Ok, enough soapy stuff.

Happy birthday man!

It seriously has been awhile since we actually celebrated your birthday, and by now probably used to it already. So i'll just wish you a great one here, hoping that you will enjoy this special day given to you filled with fun and meaningful interactions.

Take care! :)

Character

I feel like a ted.

I want to be a barney.

I sometimes am a marshall,

Who wants a lily.

Nay, i don't want to be a robin as well,

Nor wants a stella, better another,

As you can obviously tell,

This is from How I Met Your Mother.

I been sleeping quite a bit, more so than when i actually had classes, but i feel less rejuvenated. Bah, that is why sometimes i dislike having a bit more time in my hands, apart from having to be able to do more things beside studies, it just gives more time to think, too much maybe.

In the next two weeks, those who has classes will go back to their respective states and have their classes, thesis will be due and birthdays.

You know how people say you gotta make a name for yourself so everyone knows you? I always thought i rather want to know everybody, that'd be cooler. Of course, that is impossible, but its a good thought.

So anyway, past week and so, been seeing people whom i hardly met for awhile, obviously every one of them i met smiled, who knows what really went on with their lives. But good to know that they are coping. I know of some people who still remain in their high school self. Yea, high school was great, sheltered, friends, things you can manage, all you do is try to study and do fun stuff. But life goes on, and yet i see some of them still stuck, refusing to leave it behind, they still act the same, in my perspective, the real world has made them powerless, therefore to regain the power they relive the point where they felt more in control. I see whats going on, but its not healthy.

But i see this people still alive and well, so maybe its not so bad after all? Who am i to play judge, guess everyone copes differently, the study of human behavior is interesting, yet no one person can fully understand another.

People keep saying why am look so emo. Probably 'cause of the hair, now its like a side parting, and Justin said i should smile more, if i could get proper sleep, maybe i would, haha. As of now, i like to get my MANOVA done, clueless, i don't foresee better sleeping nights, but more sleepless nights as the month of August approaches!

I uttered few words in a silent prayer, if God is out there, i hope He was listening.

Yes and No

Taiping, was in one huge word: AWESOME

Highlights:

• Ipoh Foh San too many people :(
• Burmese pool was... kinda meh, prefer sungai pisang! Whee!
• Bukit Merah was.... well... was... erm... rainy.
• Duck Rice was awesome!! MmmMMmM!!
• Maxwell hill, totally great, saved that i was so out of shape, i couldn't possibly trek up that high.
• When sitting the jeep going 1036 km up to maxwell hill, gosh, the ride is exhilirating! Like a roller coaster but potentially can be thrown off, so you gotta hang on to dear life, plus don't eat so full before the ride, bad bad feeling.
• Taiping lake is pretty!!

Slow slow moving town, but a good town nonetheless, glad we made it for a short trip, it was fun, gotta leave the rush feeling of PJ awhile to take time to enjoy what earth has to offer.

Back to PJ was a whole different feel, but the brief escape was a welcome.

Didn't took effort to take more pictures, but i got quite a few good ones i hope. Tried taking a few emo pics, wonder how that will turn out.

Thanks to those who were so hospitable, and the host who was so gracious and sporting!

Time to buckle up and start doing some work, and enjoy too!

Crud

Gonna leave for Taiping in a few hours, a good start to my holidays :)

Gonna try to chill.

Gonna do some reflecting.

Gonna be cool.

With the sem ended, a lot of things came to mind, the idea of going to find a job soon, graduating, adapting and what not has been bothersome. Life ain't what it was 2 years ago, life ain't gonna be the same 2 years from now, live in the present, hope for the best in the future.

I suppose, that, in the past half a year, i've grown in thinking, thinking more responsibly, maybe due to whatever is happening to my family, to things. One thing for sure, i won't live life like a pile of crap.

I promise i won't end up like this roman catholic who came to my house and scolded my mom for not knowing where my neighbor (the amazon lady) went, my mom is her keeper now? You, being religious and supposedly upright, why now only you come to help this poor neighbor of mine, where are you when she needed your help at her worst times? Hypocrite.

Holidays.

Yet shoulders are heavy. People crying in front of you isn't the best times in my. Maybe thats why i avoid being a counselor. Don't think i can handle it.

Met up with an old friend earlier, how did he get where he was? I realized being a real friend, albeit a jackass sometimes, much better than striving to be the "right" friend. Funny how things work this way, humans often try too hard and bring misery upon themselves.

I rather enjoy what i do than what i should do. But for now, balancing both ain't easy.

Well, the only sure thing i guess i could say right now about my life? Won't cut hair till December.

Prison Gate

Fellow friends, if you remember we made a bet on who marry first and marry last couple years ago. Specifically 2007. Unfortunately i lost the original paper of that account, so boys and girls, time to revise the whole thing!

We got quite a few people, now we can add more. We got Jeff, Justin, Nesh, Nie, Ong-sama, Envyno, Keren, myself, TKH, Hoc, Charis and some more?

Plus the game has changed! Some got together with another, some still dead single (Exhibit A: Me). So, probably funner now to revise the bet, if you all still keen....

-TurnBack-

Dunderfunk

Two more exams to go! Then holidays [plus do thesis 2 :( ]

Been playing guitar a bit more lately, realized shouldn't let things get in the way of things i'm passionate about.

On a brigther note, i've been sleeping more, dreams are fun. Will chronicle it.

..We Trust

Lyrics playing in my head

I forgot the time we've met

Misplaced guidance in a book

The faith my wave overtook

I dare not say it now

The words are to my tongue foul

This is the place where my body rest

No more, no more being obsessed

I shall speak, one truth remains

Ignorance now is to remain sane

Anything more more would be more loss

Shall life now be decided by a coin toss

In whom shall we trust?

In the end, we all go back to dust.

-Babel-