Dike

CNY is ending, i mean in a fashion that is erm,

it just means i have to stop sleeping late, mamak less and return to uni! Argh!!

How can you take the pressure of being the president of a powerful country, that won't negotiate with terrorist but yet if you don't, risking your own citizens' innocent lives?
Deciding between doing the right thing that may cause casualties or doing the wrong thing to save lives, where is the compromise?

Answer: We need a damn Jack Bauer.

Or if no such person then erm, i also wouldn't know what to do really.

Is it ok to do something wrong in order to do the right thing?
In my opinion, wrong is always a wrong, no way you can push around it, the end doesn't justify the means, i know how naive that can sound, but still, try to stick to it if possible, somethings you do you can never undo it, think about that.

In the meantime, its the weekends!!! LET ME ENJOY MY LAST REAL CNY MOMENTS! WHOO-HOO!

-I'm Like a Bird-

crapss

I totally overslept on a accidental nap!

And missed an online group meeting discussing some stuff that needed to hand in the following day!
Bugger!

Crap man, they already think i am slacking, in their defense though, the things i do are not obvious loud.

Argh, the pain of being in a group. Darn it.

Why did i have to sleep? Though it was precious, but still, my group mates are gonna hold this on me for awhile and now i have to do all the crappy work just because of this!

The only positive thing out of this was that i had a outright awesome dream which i cannot divulge here. Clearly etched in my mind now, so i could retrieve it anytime, thank God for long term memory, now to apologize to my group mates..

-Man-

Why do i feel...

...like my crazy amazon lady neighbor is a bother?
She just wanted to borrow some candles if i have some to spare, i know she is taking advantage, but if i have any to spare, shouldn't i help anyway? She is alone, mentally ill and have no water or electricity source, she just needed some bloody candles, why do i feel like she owed me her life or something.

...like an escapist escaping from this place? Got too many things to worry, yet not doing anything, important things going to shamble and becoming rubble, but i'm still trying to leave it a day later and later and later.

...like 2nd rate?

...like God is so far from me?

...like i am myself, when i know i ain't the same?

...this post is silly, since no one knows anything anyway?-Beginning of a life sentence-

(Kid)ding.

Chinese new year. Yay!

Not going back Mom's hometown, so free to do anything. Wait, too free!
Dammit!

Dad's relatives dropped by, no idea who are they. Apparently i damn small that time they knew me and sae, oh whatever!
But have they rights to comment on me? NO.
WHO THE HECK ARE THEY?
I read a blog entry once, it says during CNY, relatives damn stupid, always ask stupid things that make you feel like crap.
1. You got gf/bf already? Aww, no?
2. Hey, did you grow fatter?
3. You working already? No, how old are you??
4. Psychology? What the heck? So you like mental patients?
5. No seriously, have you grown fatter?

Man, annoying, can't you be like all nice and lovely instead?
And also, THEIR KIDS

WEI, kids man,
My mom babysat quite a few babies, but when they are 5 and below, they are shoooooo cuutteeeeee i wanna squeeze them tight and just not let go, unless they suffocate and die, then i let go.

But when they are OLDER, ANNOYING ALAM SOUND PLEASE!

Like my dad's relative punya kids, think you what, your house ah? Ordering me around, show no respect, don't even remember my name wei!
Can't use the computer, wait, your generation doesn't know how to use the comp? AMAZING! seriously, i was dumbfounded, i thought this generation onwards all comp savvy, i was wrong!
Anyway, don't know please ask! NOT ORDER, thank you hoc mun for saving me from them before i went nuts.

Bottomline:
Babies = yes (only if you don't have to take care of them, only play)
Children = NO!

-Smoke on the water (guitar solo rings!)-

Year of the bull, ox? bull? cow??

Not going back Mom's home town, meaning less ang pows!

But then again, means more relatively alone time here!!! Well, i say relatively, meaning the roads will be awesome to drive your car on! Take yesterday, no jam, super smooth, how rare is that?

But no ang pows = less money, crappology, meaning this year gonna be poor like heck, okok, poor is the wrong word, there are people who are really poor.

And i am fortunate to have clothes, food and shelter, I have the first few Mazlow's pyramid covered, i'm good i'm good.

I realized we always take things for granted, say, sleeping time, its a time to rest and prep for the next day, how awesome is that?

How about just doing nothing, solitude is a precious gift God gave us. Doing nothing is healthy! If not all the prophets and Jesus wouldn't be doing it!

Oh oh, how about not conforming, we always take for granted being yourself is unacceptable, humans are flawed. They always need acceptance, no one is truly unique, and i think its not cool, if a person cannot be who God made that person to be, then might as well throw a shoe to God and say, "piss off"

So stop judging your friends, if they are jerks and idiots and bearable, BEAR WITH IT. If not go screw yourself and get friends hanging on strings to be your pals.

There's also your mom, don't take her for granted.

The only things you can take for granted are girl friends and boy friends, not important in life!

Muahahha.

-Bridexplotion-

I Do (?)

Currently listening: Plumb, Lifehouse and Audio Adrenaline.
Hoping: Take more pics, haven't been taking much.
Doing mostly: Sleeping, sweet sleep. one of God's best creation.


Just got home not too long ago from a meet up with a couple of church mates whom i haven't seen in awhile, one even just got home from Australia not too long ago, so it was good. If not i don't know when i would actually meet up with them.

It was pretty early into the night, but the married couple deemed late and was looking pretty worn out and was ready to head home, while usually for me the night was too young.

Does marriage actually make you boring??

Ok let me try to analyze.

First you gotta invest in making the effort to obtain a girl friend (for me ler, boyfriend if you all are girls) : Investment
now of course not every tom, dick and harry or in this case sue, mary and maria can be your girl friend right? Unless you're playing around or have really low standards or you're blind, or well, you were meant to be with them.
Getting a girl to be your girlfriend gonna be tough, first must be friends :(
Then must be her best friend, then must have the guts to pop the question and prepare for 90% chance of rejection.

Ok, if you pass that, congratulations! Now the bloody hard part kicks in: Maintenance.
Maintaining a girl friend is hard in my opinion, unless the girl is wholly devoted to you and submissive, i think most guys find it hard to maintain it.
You gotta make it stay fresh, keep her attracted to you.
Hardest part is to BE LOYAL to her.
Almost (no empirical evidence to back this up) all the time when you have a girlfriend, A LOT of hot girls who ain't your girl friend will start popping up in your life, most of the time making you sway your devotion from your current girl to another, or at least think, "Damn, did I get a gf too early while there are plenty of girls to consider?"

Also, financial is a problem, unless you're a rich brat or working, i doubt you have the money to go dating, you REALLY wanna spend your parent's hard earned money on another individual? hmm?
And if your gf is high maintenance, your wallet is screwed, always must pay for her, fetch her around. But if your gf don't mind spending time with you as dating, or go out mamak or use public transport, then count yourself awesomely fortunate.

Last but not least, if you let your gf be boss over you, meaning you always do what she says, you're also screwed, first you will have less friends, then you will spend too much time interacting with her, pretty much you're a prisoner in your own home or her home or of her.

Ok say you got through all of those, and still in a relationship, crap, you are good, you made it!
So whats the next step? : Seal the Deal.
Yea, propose to her, you idiot!
Assuming you gonna give up a lot of freedom, hang out time, mamak time, talking to other girls a lot, cannot be sloppy, money is now shared, cannot buy your stuff, manga and anime will be thrown out the window, football or any sports you like and time spent significantly reduced.
Of course got perks too, but i think cost outweighs benefits.

Ok, proposing, unless your gf is artistic and like weird stuff, don't bet that your gf gonna fall for your "Fig ring", "can ring", "diamonds don't matter cheapass ring". Girls already fall for the advertisement devil's trap that diamonds are symbols of love! which is total bullcrap.
So you gonna spend a lot on the stupid ring.
Then you have to find the right time to propose.
NO! NO! Don't do stupid things like banner proposal or billboard, it's stupid, waste of money and i think not romantic.
Do stuff like sing with a guitar (cliche but girls sucker for it), or do a broadway or something out of the ordinary so you can brag to your friends and kids later.

Assuming she said "yes." you're good to go!
Next is: Pay the price.... wait for it..... FOREVER!

First, wedding is bloody expensive, unless your family don't mind some non-cliche weddings, (I hate chinese weddings, my wedding will be awesome). You're screwed financially, one wedding cost a bomb, bride's wedding dress, pro photographer (that's why now perk of being into photography so your chun friends can take your pics for free, *cough*hoc mun*cough, oh they must be good la, so er, no offense if i call someone else if you suck in it), dowry (if it still exist), wedding dinner etc etc!

Ok, after all that hassle, you're married! You experience things for the first time in your life like making love, having a companion at home, someone to cook for you (like a maid) etc. Also I am assuming you don't sleep around much ler.

Few years down the road, you finally starting to know your partner, and you either accept and reject their true self, not only that, wife wants your commitment, and so she wants you home all the time and spend 'quality' time and less with your buddies, whom i think are also important.
You work from 9-5, come home exhausted, but wife wants to talk and ask you take care of kids.
She forbids you from reading manga, playing games, online, watching "unproductive" movies etc etc.
You have no time for guitar, no time to climb up the corporate ladder (if you lazy due to marriage commitments la), no time for other social interaction, no time for exercise (which explains the tummy bulging out), all you can do is hope your brat kid grow up fast so you can retire and catch up on time lost due to marriage.

Then you die.

What if you were single slightly longer?
Scenario changes.
You focus on work, be at the top of ladder, and now girls admire you more, easier to get gf, financial wise no problem, house and car you got, pay for wedding and diamonds? Small expenses versus the amount of business class trips you make. Wife wants you around the house, you got 3G phone, can always "spend quality time" since you can see her while making a call, and because you're at the top of the ladder, a lot of parties and business calls to make, your wife would and should understand. So you got a life outside of house. Wife complains you not helping, hire a maid, you got enough savings so no need rely on your brat kid to grow up fast, can take it slowly and enjoy life while having everything else.

So why rush into marriage or even looking for a gf?
Chill man.



Sigh, I'm still single.

-One By One-

Scam!

"I like psychology, but 'I AM U' also offers medical...."

Radio commercial i heard over the radio....

First of all, if you wanna do medicine, why mention psychology? And by mentioning "also", are you somehow implying and referring to some other uni like, i don't know, some uni that is famous for offering Psychology as a course? hmm?

Stupid commercial, fight fair la.

-Sea of Familiar Faces-

Backdoor

Sundays are a good time to rest.

Rest is good.

It leads to refreshment.

And reflection.

-FunHouse-

The Rat Clothed In Gold

My sis, not a brother i wished i had,
but things aren't really that bad.
She maybe fire and i am water,
but she makes a fine sister and a damn good daughter.

I fight with her, i argue with her, lots,
but that doesn't mean i ran her out of my thoughts.
Rather, she is just being her and me being me,
And i wouldn't trade our relationship for for any amount of money.

All in all, after all has been said and done,
We may have our bad times and horrible, some.
But, she's still my sister and no one can take her place.
Happy birthday Dewgem, hope this puts a beautiful smile on your face! =)

-Only One In The World-

Drinks for Thought

Sometimes, people get prettier the more you know them. Inner beauty? Love?

Or you just lowered your standards?

A pastor always preach on sunday, but always, halfway thru, the congregation leave, leaving the pastor feeling embarrassed.
So what does he do?
The following sundays, he told the congregation he first preach a sermon for the sinners, then only for the righteous. So, halfway, he said the sermon was preached, the sinners can leave, no one left, and the pastor gets to preach his sermon till the end.
Hypocrites?

When a friend no longer knows how to listen. Still a friend? or an acquaintance?

Rather be known as the intelligent one or the funny one? (hehe, written specifically with someone in mind)

Follow what you wanna do or live stereotypically?

Purposeful living or living happily?

Pray and hope that God will provide for your parents when they retire and you go ahead and do something else or rely on your own and earn bloody heck loads of cash for your parents and your future family?

-Colored People-

Dead to Sin

This year i should graduate, hopefully if all is well and good, planned out the subjects i need to complete my studies, please let it be ok!

Thesis to be started this sem, still empty in my head, blank, tabula rasa, dead inside, whatever, i can't think of something to kick start, there goes my Honest.

On the bright side i got a 4 day weekend, due to my nicely packed schedule. More time for drinks, call me dammit.
ook, not that desperate hehe.

Are christians really some kind of zombie?

"Man, I ain't changed, but i know i' ain'tt the same" - One Headlight, The Wallflowers.

-The Broken Clock-

You're beautiful, you're confusing.

You're illogical, you're amazing.

I've seen the world, it's overrated.

-Empty Space, Lifehouse-

-Incoming-

Back Then...

Finally, the right keys to the right locks for the first time, one for the gate one for the door.

Right before, stepped out the car, greeted by gentle breeze, followed by noises of drunkards shouting, demanding to be heard, then became sobbing and cried, sad really, but true, "won't wanna be one like them." i muttered to myself.

Life in my neighborhood, never gets old, people die, mugged, stories to tell for those who want to listen if they spare the time.

During my formative teenager years, the awkward bodily changes and growing raging hormones somewhere in you, i spent most of it in a video shop down the road to the left. Beside a old man's bar, beside a prison old folks home (oddly, shaped like one), up some old stairs is a video shop! Renting out videos for a minimal fee, there i spent quite some time, being a dork i was/am, i just hung out, and strangely, mom didn't care much.

There i learned to read old written chinese words, how to bet on football, curse words, everything a mom shouldn't ever teach their son, i learned it all there. Of course i will not put anything up here that will do me no good, but i learned every bad there is. Grateful, but i think, next time, i just teach my kids, safer. My kids will yield.

-Graveyard for Rice-