Leaves

We never grow out of certain things, say, fear of clowns, hugging parents before sleep, doodle on everything.
Yet there are always things we do.

We compromise, we give up, we rationalize, we always "settle".

In just a short week, 3 of my good friends left the country, to different places for very different reasons.

It is nothing short of a joy i feel for them, moving past norms and transcends societal expectations. Being propelled to places unknown, it's like being born again. I wonder if this is the way life should be, is our inner voice telling us to settle down just something we inherit from culture?

Is love supposed to be following a schedule, or are all these a by product of just being within a community?

"No one wants to be defeated" So sang a famous entertainer who passed away way too soon. Yet by not feeling defeated, does it mean we are victorious? I could just tweak my mindset a lil', push certain pieces puzzle out of the picture, redefine standards, and i would no longer be "defeated", i'd be happy, for real, even if it means to compromise, that's not to sat it isn't a good thing, but is it?

I cannot add an ounce to which this life is given to me, i have only so much time left, and i sometimes spend it thinking and writing it down here, i think about all the past thinkers, thinkers whose philosophy gripped the world, but to what end? The more we know, the more we cannot "settle". This is why, i think, that a job isn't just a job, a degree isn't just a degree, the more we know, the more we have to work towards something more purposeful, even it means doing the same thing over and over again, it won't suck if there is meaning to it.

We drown ourselves in things that cannot satisfy, and i won't even bother to preach what can satisfy us.

To Justin who left this country in pursuit of a better life out there:
Life isn't what you expected it to be, it has never been kind, nor has it directed you to someplace you'd thought you'd be, people have loads of opinion, including myself, and who am i to bring up God? One thing i dare say, is that, being there, where you are, probably is the most fucked up scariest shit you may have done, leaving quite a lot behind, evidence by tears seen in your friend's eyes, having a family you loved and leaving them for the better or worse. I guess, i don't really care what choice you make there and how you are going to live your life there, one thing i'd like to ask though: stay alive.

A drop, on the leaves it weighs,

Contemplating to hold or let go,

Winds swept and winds howled,

Unforgiving was the sun,

Unkind was the clouds,

In cycles of darkness,

In repetition of light,

In former glory,

Arise again,

You.