Nothing Good Happens After 2 a.m.

Relationships aren't my forte.

I think i always been struggling with relationships, be it with family, friends, acquaintances or the most important - God.

And sometimes i wonder why God would wired me such way.

I hardly can get close to anyone, because i believe people will disappoint, i always think i am setting up myself for disappointment, so when i do get close to someone, i tend to have thoughts that leads me to shun the person off awhile until the friendship drops into the "just friends" zone, then i'll be normal again.

Or sometimes i create unnecessary arguments just so to prove my point that humans disappoint and this ending some friendships or destroying some.

That explains my lack of close friends.

Those who have stuck me by probably learned enough to know that i can be a douche and just deal with it, and i probably fought with them one way or another =p

With God, i am just like the Israelites, taking God for granted in good times and pursuing God in bad.

In the bible, it was considered like prostitution and cheating, so that makes me a whore?

In any case, it is worth pondering that why i am like this.

Could be my family upbringing, or my past that made me so, if only i could psychoanalyze myself as well as some of my friends do.

Well, i foresee a future where i'll one day just don't care and live life.

Till then, this will be a matter of concern.

Seeing how many failed friendships, failed girl friendships and countless countless failed God relationships i've made, i decided to stick with Lost's saying, "live together, die alone"

-Ooh? Dramatic Baby G! -